It’s time…

6 Jan

“The reality is that we don’t forget, move on, and have closure, but rather we honor, we remember, and incorporate our deceased children and siblings into our lives in a new way. In fact, keeping memories of your loved one alive in your mind and heart is an important part of your healing journey.” ~ Harriet Schiff, author of The Bereaved Parent

This weekend marks Sammy’s 4th heavenly birthday. It doesn’t even seem possible that four years have passed since the last time we held Sammy in our arms.

This weekend, Steve and I are taking a road trip to West Virginia to visit David, one of my favorite little guys with HPE. On what would have been Sammy’s 6th birthday, we made this same trip. The goal of that trip was to deliver Sammy’s wheelchair to David. This time, we are delivering Sammy’s bath chair to him.

We have only given a few of Sammy’s things away because I just haven’t been ready to part with things yet. Everything holds such meaning and memory, but maybe it’s time to take pictures of things and let some things go. There are other children who need or want these things that have just been sitting unused in my closets for 4 years.

So, I’ve decided to make a scrapbook for my memories… including a picture of Sammy using the item or playing with a toy, a picture of the item or toy by itself, and a picture of the recipient using or playing with the toy. In addition to the photos, I can journal a memory, share my feelings on letting go, or my thoughts about the recipient(s). All there for me to look at whenever I want.

It won’t be easy, and I know I’ll need help to do it, but it’s time.

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